7 Things Only Vegans in South Africa Will Understand
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Being vegan in South Africa is like playing a survival video game on “expert” mode with half the instructions missing and someone shouting “Just eat biltong!” from the sidelines. It’s a lifestyle choice, yes—but it’s also a social experiment, a personal growth challenge, and occasionally a test of your WiFi signal in Checkers while Googling if that one yoghurt is, in fact, dairy-free. South Africans are nothing if not passionate about meat, and when you casually mention that you’re vegan, the reactions range from “Shame, man” to “But chicken’s not meat, though?” And while Cape Town may be a kale-powered vegan paradise, venture outside the bubble and you’ll be explaining tofu like it’s an alien lifeform. If you’re a local plant-based legend, you’ll know these truths hit harder than a slap-chip craving at 2am.
1. The Braai Struggle Is Real
There is no event more socially loaded than the South African braai. It’s not just a meal—it’s a religion. And as a vegan, you’ve basically chosen apostasy. You arrive with your marinated mushrooms or plant-based boerie, hoping to gently educate the crowd, only to be met with ten pairs of eyes silently screaming, “Why?” The braai master offers you a corner of the grill “near the chicken” as a gesture of goodwill. Someone else offers you a potato salad… with egg mayo. You clutch your Tupperware like it’s a protest sign and pretend you’re not dying inside. Bonus points if someone jokes, “Don’t worry, we’ve got lettuce for you.”
2. You’ve Had That One Family Member Try to Trick You
There’s always one. An auntie who swears the stew is vegan, only to casually admit halfway through that she added beef stock “for flavour.” A cousin who offers you ice cream and, when confronted, says, “But it’s light cream, it doesn’t count.” Or the classic: “It’s just a little butter.” South African families run on love, passive-aggression, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what “plant-based” means. Eventually, you bring your own food to family gatherings and develop a sixth sense for unannounced chicken broth.
3. The Menu Dance at Restaurants
You walk into a restaurant with cautious optimism. You scan the menu. Nothing. Then, just when you’re about to ask the waiter for help, you see it: a lone falafel wrap. Hallelujah! You ask if it comes with tzatziki. It does. You ask if you can swap it for hummus. The waiter blinks. A manager is summoned. Ten minutes later, you settle on a side salad and chips, again. Even at “inclusive” spots, the vegan option is often a sad plate of grilled vegetables pretending to be a meal. Shoutout to every restaurant that proudly offers “vegetarian” options with hidden dairy and cheese as the main character.
4. You’ve Memorised the Vegan Safe Zones
Ask any vegan in SA and they’ll rattle off a list of their go-to safe havens. In Cape Town, it’s places like Lekker Vegan, The Conscious Kitchen, or Plant. In Joburg, you’ve got Kaylee’s Eatery or Free Food Deli. And every Woolies aisle has been mentally mapped for hummus, nut milks, and ready-made tofu curry. When you travel, it’s reconnaissance mode. You search “vegan near me” with military precision and pack back-up snacks like you’re hiking the Drakensberg. Finding a new vegan-friendly spot feels like discovering gold—only you can eat it.
5. Explaining Protein for the 1000th Time
“Where do you get your protein?” If you had a rand for every time someone asked you that, you could probably open your own vegan butchery. It’s the question that haunts every plant-based South African. You explain legumes, tofu, quinoa. They nod politely, then offer you chicken as a compromise. Or worse—boiled eggs. You eventually develop a pre-written speech that includes fun facts about elephants, gorillas, and the fact that your kidneys thank you daily. But it never ends. And neither do the unsolicited iron deficiency warnings from people who think kale is a personality.
6. The Emotional Toll of Braai Day
Heritage Day. National Braai Day. The one public holiday where everyone feels personally attacked by your tofu skewers. Social media becomes a sea of meat. Your WhatsApp groups fill with “Come over for a chop” messages. You consider going into hiding. When you politely decline, people assume you hate culture, community, and joy. You don’t. You just don’t want to get mocked for bringing lentil sausages to a fire pit full of lamb. One year, you try to host your own vegan braai. Five people show up. Two of them brought chicken “just in case.”
7. That One Time You Found a Vegan Gatsby and Ascended Spiritually
For all the struggle, there are those transcendent moments when South African veganism delivers gold. Like that time you found a full vegan Gatsby and almost cried into your slap chips. Or that weekend you discovered dairy-free koeksisters and questioned your entire existence. Those moments remind you that the culture is shifting. Slowly. Awkwardly. But shifting. And you, plant-based warrior, are part of the revolution—one bite of chickpea scramble at a time.
Final Thoughts
Being vegan in South Africa isn’t just a dietary choice—it’s an identity, a mission, and a daily exercise in patience. You’ve defended your hummus, mastered the eye-roll at meat jokes, and survived the most carnivorous country in the southern hemisphere with grace and garlic salt. Whether you’re vibing in the vegan-friendly streets of Cape Town or trying to explain nutritional yeast to your uncle in Potchefstroom, know this: you are not alone. You are part of a deliciously defiant tribe. And together, we will rise—like almond flour muffins in a flaxseed-lined tin.
