What Would You Do If You Found a Dead Body In Your Hotel Room?

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Alright, let’s get straight into this… but what Would You Do If You Found a Dead Body In a Hotel Room? Now, before you grab your garlic and wooden stakes, remember that we’re here for a bit of a laugh, so get ready and let’s discuss this rather unusual conundrum.

Scenario One: The Dramatic Gasping Let’s say you’ve just sauntered into your swanky hotel room, ready to unwind after a long day of travel. You casually toss your luggage onto the bed, only to discover – gasp – a dead body lying there! In this situation, your first course of action should be a dramatic gasp, followed by a hasty retreat to the hallway. After all, you’ll want to save your breath for the inevitable call to the hotel reception.

Scenario Two: The Poirot Approach Upon discovering the aforementioned dead body, you may feel an inexplicable urge to channel your inner Hercule Poirot or Miss Marple. In this case, you’ll want to don your detective hat and examine the room for any clues as to what happened. Be sure to speak with a thick Belgian or English accent as you deduce the cause of death. Remember, though, that you’re not actually a detective – so you’ll still need to alert hotel staff and let the professionals handle the situation.

Scenario Three: The Emergency Playlist If you’ve found yourself in this macabre situation, why not take a moment to cue up an appropriate playlist on your phone? After all, nothing sets the scene like a bit of mood music! Some suggestions include:

  • “Another One Bites the Dust” by Queen
  • “Stayin’ Alive” by Bee Gees (because, well, irony)
  • “Don’t Fear the Reaper” by Blue Öyster Cult
  • “Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door” by Bob Dylan

Once you’ve got the tunes sorted, you can proceed to contact the hotel staff and await the cavalry. Just remember to keep the volume down – you don’t want to disturb the other guests!

Scenario Four: The Social Media Update In today’s world of non-stop sharing, it’s only natural that you’d want to document your eerie encounter for posterity. However, before you start snapping photos and posting them on social media, remember that some things are best left offline. Instead, opt for a cryptic status update that will leave your followers guessing, like “You won’t believe what I found in my hotel room!” or “Is it just me, or has this trip taken a turn for the macabre?” Once you’ve satisfied your social media fix, be sure to notify the hotel staff and let them handle the situation.

Scenario Five: The Hasty Room Change If you’re feeling pragmatic and just want to put this whole ordeal behind you, it’s time to request a room change – and fast! Simply dial the front desk, calmly explain the situation, and ask for a new room as far away from your current one as possible. While you’re at it, you may want to inquire about a complimentary upgrade – after all, you’ve just stumbled upon a deceased guest, and that surely warrants a bit of extra pampering. Once you’ve secured your new accommodations, bid farewell to your unfortunate roommate and make a mental note to add “found a dead body in a hotel room” to your list of conversation starters for your next dinner party.

Scenario Six: The Existential Reflection As you stand there, gazing upon the lifeless form before you, it’s only natural that you might experience a moment of existential reflection. After all, our time on this earth is fleeting, and it’s important to make the most of every moment. Use this opportunity to ponder the meaning of life, the inevitability of death, and whether you’ve been prioritising the things that truly matter. Once you’ve had your fill of philosophical musings, be sure to snap back to reality and alert the hotel staff to the situation at hand.

Scenario Seven: The Comedy Routine In the face of such an unusual and macabre predicament, sometimes the best way to cope is through humour. As you await the arrival of hotel staff and any necessary authorities, consider crafting a comedy routine based on your experience. You might open with a line like, “So, I walked into a hotel room and there was a dead body on the bed. Talk about getting the cold shoulder!” Just remember that timing is everything, so perhaps save your routine for a more appropriate setting, like an open-mic night or a gathering of friends.

In all seriousness, if you ever find yourself in the unfortunate situation of discovering a dead body in a hotel room, it’s important to remain calm and notify hotel staff immediately. While our tongue-in-cheek scenarios are all in good fun, dealing with such a situation can be distressing, and it’s crucial to let the appropriate authorities handle the matter.

Encountering a dead body in a hotel room is a rather unlikely and peculiar scenario, but we hope our light-hearted take on the topic has brought a smile to your face. Remember, life is full of surprises, both delightful and macabre – so always be prepared for the unexpected, and don’t forget to keep your sense of humour intact. Until our next bizarre adventure, happy travels!

Shaun Zietsman https://www.thesomethingguy.co.za

Blogger and Content Creator from Johannesburg, South Africa.

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